Posted by: Chris Maloney | April 16, 2011

JUS: You ain’t never had such an explosive experience.

Defecation in the sitting position, as used in...

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Warning:  the following is a graphic description of body activity.  If you have a weak stomach, or are eating, you might want to take a pass. 

Ok, now you get the truly joyous part of doing what I do.  Every week I get offers for miracle products.  Every one of them is going to solve all of my patients problems.  So, lacking an enormous research facility, I test these things out on…me. 

Jus, produced by Havvn (Utah based network marketing– I know, I know) has no qualms about letting you know that their products basically make you live longer. 

It’s about par for the course, honestly.  I’ve never met a company who didn’t think their product would allow you to walk on water and heal the sick as long as you kept buying it every month. 

So I tried Jus.  Since I’ve got a strong constitution and it looked like, well, juice, I downed five ounces on the first morning of the new year.  I recorded my reaction for posterity, minute by minute, below.  I just want to say that Jus is the most explosive laxative I’ve ever had the misfortune to encounter.  Beyond its laxative capacity, its ability to ferment in my bowels is also unsurpassed.  It has this result in common with what most good quality probiotics do for me.  It is certainly NOT just juice!

So, I know, all of you out there think I should give it a second chance.  Take it as prescribed, for goodness sake.  I did so, showing I think formidable bravery in the face of severe flatulence.  I downed an ounce as prescribed and ended what was otherwise a pleasant evening with two rushed bowel movements.

Let me also say that my better half, who joined me in this escapade, had no ill effects whatsoever.  She is now trying Jus officially, and I will note any improvements in her ability to heal the sick and make the lame walk.  I will also say that the distributor, Marianne Winnett, is a wonderful person and the only reason I went back for a second round.  She has had wonderful experiences with Jus and will be glad to tell you all about them. 

The Jus experiment:  1/1/11 and 1/16/11

JUS  Provided by Marianne Winnett  Jus’ distributor 

Telephone number:  (207) 242-2884

Email:  creativeharmony@myfairpoint.net

1/1/11 Jus’ Bottle was difficult to open.  Had to use a knife to break the seal.

Having tried many of these products before, I don’t try small amounts.  Give the Jus’ a chance.  (I have previously consumed ½ gallons of acai juice in a week to see the effects.)

9:40 am  Took five ounces of Jus’ on an empty stomach. 

Slight sniffle, feel a little run down. 

“Puckery” sweet taste.

9:46 Alterations mentally.  Maybe the fruit sugar content?

9:47 Mildly upset stomach, a little nausea.

9:56 Still mildly nauseous.  Burping.

10:03 Burping and gas.

10:05 Nausea worsened by the sight or smell of food.

10:09 Nausea worsened by the taste of food.

10:15 Not liking the JUS, not feeling the love.

10:18 New Year’s Resolution:  Stop using self as guinea pig

10:19 Took Nux Vomica 200c for food poisoning.

10:33 Nausea almost gone.  Burping continuing.

11:19 Still burping, no nausea.  Food has started smelling good.

12:54 Still burping, sniffles continue, attempt to eat. 

1:04 pm  Ate soup.  Sneezing within five minutes.  Burps.  No nausea.

1:09 pm Explosive purple diarrhea. 

(I’ll spare you the rest of the day).

1/2/11

Entire digestive tract feels excoriated.  Raw lips and mouth. 

1/16/11 

7:21 pm  One ounce (cap) on full belly.

7:22 Burping.

9:24  Urgent Bowel movement

10:08 Second urgent bowel movement. 

Ok, I’ve done my science experiment for the year.  Supporting my contention that all results are individual, I would say that Jus and doc Maloney don’t mix well. 

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